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Horrible discussion with dad's social worker
#1
Hi All,

I had a meeting today with my dad's new social worker. It's an annual thing, the problem is that this idiot spoke with my step mother first. Before she spoke to the nurses, my dad's doctors, read his notes or talked to me or my aunt. So she now thinks that I'm artifically keeping my dad alive. I've called for a review, I called for an independent report. Artifically alive, well, he takes meds for his heart, to keep his blood pressure up since he tends to run low, one multi vitamin, one anti-depressant and his trial med for his Alzheimer's. Which is due to end come March of next year, which improved his quality of life greatly. He can walk, he can feed himself, he can read. And my female dog of a stepmother convinced this idiot social worker that I should be removed as his guardian because I'm artifically keeping him alive.

Well guess what, both are in for a rude shock. The social worker had no idea that my stepmother had 2 court dockets in the past three years for her treatment of my dad. Not to mention that she's not allowed to see him alone since she has this tendency to slip him meds that he's not allowed to have. Imagine taking his idiots words over mine when I am listed as the first contact, my aunt as second and she's only about fifth down the line. This idiot social worker just read 'wife', that was enough for her. Well guess who probably won't have a job with the next 48 hours if not sooner. I just got home, going to pour myself a nice glass of wine and try and calm down. Icy roads this morning and I get this call.....she's going to wish she'd never, ever met me. I am there for my father, he's alive today because of my care. I'm not going to do anything to my stepmother over this...let her just think and believe she's back in control. Until I see her face to face at the end of this month during the monthly meeting, I can't wait...it will be sweet. I've met with the nursing home supervisor, we're good friends, she's aware of what is going on and can't believe it...I couldn't believe it.

Thanks for letting me vent, I feel better, this is going to be good. She can still see my dad, he needs to see her, it's important for him.
bodybuilder
 
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#2
WOW!!! In capital letters!

This must be a new social worker, right?

This gal sure dosesn't know her stuff.

Bodybuilder you go girl!
 
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#3
(02-13-2012, 07:52 PM)Bummer Knees Wrote: WOW!!! In capital letters!

This must be a new social worker, right?

This gal sure dosesn't know her stuff.

Bodybuilder you go girl!


Brand new, but not for long.
She called this morning, not unexpected. Usually I get a letter asking me to call, I had the letter reminding me of the review but usually I get something different from the actual case worker. I told her that we could meet late morning/early afternoon and unless her caseload was busy (which it wasn't ) she could then meet with my dad after our meeting.

Well imagine my shock when we met and the first thing out of her mouth was that she had already talked to my stepmother. Uh, why, she has no say or control over anything. Well according to this idiot my stepmother had opened her eyes to what might actually be going on. Well it's a good thing that the nursing supervisor walked in at that time (she's always included in the meetings), otherwise I might of come unglued. I let the supervisor know asap that the social worker had already spoken to my stepmother and that she claimed that things perhaps weren't right with his care. Wrong thing to say on her part, talk about being bombarded with charts, information, other staff members, etc.

Waiting for a call from the state, this is going to be good, I can feel it. Heads are going to roll, bowling with heads, such fun.
Poof, the social worker is gone...my report has been filed, hit the send button about 15 minutes ago. The home will send their report by 10:00am tomorrow, it won't be pretty, she's gone, won't be back. Meeting with someone else who will have read the report on Thursday morning. At the nursing home, with all concerned present except my dad, the social worker meets with my dad later, less stressful for him. It's usually during his lunch or evening meal, he likes that, or even during TV time, some place relaxed. I've requested a 'male' social worker and it's been approved, probably a supervisor, I don't care. Time for them to kiss my behind. I've done all my paperwork, it's always in way ahead of time. My father gets excellent care, I like the staff and they like me, I often send goodies for the staff or even make a couple of cakes for them. My father is happy there, he kinda understands the mess with my stepmother but never mentions it. He would prefer that they meet alone, in his room, never, ever going to happen, always in the commons room, always atleast one member of staff there, her bags are always checked before she goes in. Lately she just leaves her purse at the nurses station, all bags are check, she can't take him fresh fruit anymore, that's another story.
 
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#4
OMG!!! If one vitamin, a heart pill, an anti depressant and a trial alzhiemer med is "artificially keeping him alive", I guess most of us should be dead, at least most of us on here anyways. Damn, I take 5 or 6 meds myself, not counting my vitamins! If the wicked stepMONSTER has to be frisked and can't be with him alone because she has slipped him some pills he shouldn't have...isn't that criminal? That is serious, she could have killed him or maybe that is what she was trying for. Good god, it sounds like you have your plate full of yuckiness.

As far as that social worker, yea, she should kiss her job goodbye and maybe get ready to shovel poop at a local zoo or something. Really, READ the file first, that's why people write in them....you have to wonder with some people how they made it through college. I hope you kick their butts straight fast so you can get back to peaceful visitng with your dad and hopefully find a way to get stepMONSTER off the visitor list!
Live, Laugh, Love ~
 
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#5
OMG!!! If one vitamin, a heart pill, an anti depressant and a trial alzhiemer med is "artificially keeping him alive", I guess most of us should be dead, at least most of us on here anyways. Damn, I take 5 or 6 meds myself, not counting my vitamins! If the wicked stepMONSTER has to be frisked and can't be with him alone because she has slipped him some pills he shouldn't have...isn't that criminal? That is serious, she could have killed him or maybe that is what she was trying for. Good god, it sounds like you have your plate full of yuckiness.

As far as that social worker, yea, she should kiss her job goodbye and maybe get ready to shovel poop at a local zoo or something. Really, READ the file first, that's why people write in them....you have to wonder with some people how they made it through college. I hope you kick their butts straight fast so you can get back to peaceful visitng with your dad and hopefully find a way to get stepMONSTER off the visitor list!
Live, Laugh, Love ~
 
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#6
(02-13-2012, 10:58 PM)sonny1 Wrote: OMG!!! If one vitamin, a heart pill, an anti depressant and a trial alzhiemer med is "artificially keeping him alive", I guess most of us should be dead, at least most of us on here anyways. Damn, I take 5 or 6 meds myself, not counting my vitamins! If the wicked stepMONSTER has to be frisked and can't be with him alone because she has slipped him some pills he shouldn't have...isn't that criminal? That is serious, she could have killed him or maybe that is what she was trying for. Good god, it sounds like you have your plate full of yuckiness.

As far as that social worker, yea, she should kiss her job goodbye and maybe get ready to shovel poop at a local zoo or something. Really, READ the file first, that's why people write in them....you have to wonder with some people how they made it through college. I hope you kick their butts straight fast so you can get back to peaceful visitng with your dad and hopefully find a way to get stepMONSTER off the visitor list!

Sonny she's allowed two visits a week, that's it. That's to keep my dad happy, she's on probation and there will be extra charges added to this I'm sure. But my dad has to see her, he grieves if he doesn't see her. He can't call her directly, it's not allowed, all calls are listened in, she's been cut off on calls before. There are things she can and cannot say and it's taken over 2 yrs for her to figure that out.

I see my dad no less than 3 times a week unless we're out of town. My aunt sees him daily, she lives just 4 miles away. Other family visits when they can, he sees his grandkids weekly and that is their choice. No one makes them ever go, you shouldn't have to force kids to see family. He attended both of my nieces Christmas concerts in December, that took a lot of planning but he enjoyed it.

But you know for the sake of my father if she ended up in the home I'd make sure she also got the very best of care for his sake. I have medical power of attorney over both of them. I did go with her in January to her cardiologist appointment, we talked about a different med and you know, low and behold she's doing better on that med. I do it for my dad, only for him. Not too sure what I'd do if he died first, I'd have to really, really pray over that.
 
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#7
you would do the same thing I am doing...you would take care of her cuz you promised your Dad....
........I love cats, I just cant eat a whole one by myself......







 
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