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Birth of a baby during a power outage.
#1
Due to a power outage, The house was very dark so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-yr old girl to hold a flashlight high over her Mommy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby.. Little Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his feet and spanked him on his bottom And he began to cry. The paramedic then asked the wide-eyed 3-yr old what she thought about what she had just witnessed. She quickly responded, 'He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place, spank him again!
 
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#2
Back in the old days, Elmer and Kate were about to have a baby. Their eldest son Jacob rode into town to fetch the Dr. When the Dr. arrived at the farm, he prepared Kate for delivery. "Elmer - fetch the lantern and hold it high over this area here", said the Dr.

Elmer held the lantern as directed, and soon, out comes a healthy baby boy. As Elmer started to set the lantern down, the Dr. says "wait, Elmer, I need the lantern, I believe I've got another". Elmer complied, and out comes another baby boy.

Relieved, Elmer sets the lantern on the nearby table. "Hold on, I need the lantern, Elmer", said the Dr. As before, Elmer held the lantern again, and out comes a healthy baby girl. By this time, Elmer is getting a bit weary. He sets the lantern down again.

"No, Elmer, come back with that" the Dr. says. As soon as Elmer holds the lantern up, out comes another baby girl. Elmer pulls the lantern away a bit, and says "Hey Doc, I think they're attracted to the light".
DISCLAIMER: I am not an attorney. While drawing from my professional training and experience in law enforcement and as a former Paralegal, no comments offered should be considered as legal advice.
 
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#3
My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.

 
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