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Cheating on my spouse?
#1
I possess a strong marriage, and love the core values of marriage. I believe these values vary from one person to another, but the core values in my mind our trust and respect.
These core values affect my behavior in many ways. They give my life meaning and satisfaction, providing me with direction, guiding me through temptations and distractions, and here lies my problem…..I’m getting “hooked” or “obsessed” with this forum, the guys and gals in this forum offer me something I don’t always get from my wife, a chance to talk about my problems and listen to others with similar issues. I just feel like I’m cheating or something, sneaking around getting on this site as much as I can, maybe not communicating by posting, but just reading about others and their stories, in the short time I have been around the forum, I feel like I know many of you, I know that probably sounds a little weird…

I guess I’m asking, do many of you get your spouse involved with the forum?
 
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#2
Pote- Even though im not married, I can see where you are coming from. I spend a lot of time here as well, its my safe haven. My family knows about the forum, but yet I wont give them the link to the site. This is the only place I have that I can come to where I feel comfortable sharing my ups and downs. My family just doesnt get it.

There are some members here that share the forum with their spouses, at times you will see a spouse come on and update for their better half because they arent able to.

This forum new and old, is like an addiction to me, this is the first place I come to everyday. Even if I dont post, Im here reading.

You arent alone my friend! Smile
 
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#3
Rolleyes 
My wife gets involved a bit and reads my and the other post, it helps her understand my situation better, and it helps me knowing I'm not alone. This forum has been very beneficial for both of us. Ask your wife to get involved, she may read some of these posts and get a better understanding of what you go through! My wife actually found this post for me, so I'm not so alone when she works!Wink
 
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#4
I came onboard about 5 yrs ago when my honey got injured the first time this place offered me not only ways to help him but to help me deal with what HE was going thru now its my turn and yes he spot reads and was really looking forward to the get together this spring to put faces to the people I call my family as much as the one here at home we have all been thru so much together and I know when I am blue,happy,hurting or just feeling great my family here will share that with me....welcome your wife aboaed cuz she will need us as much as you do....cuz she is gonna be going thru just as many emotions as you do and believe me when our honeys hurt we do to
........I love cats, I just cant eat a whole one by myself......







 
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#5
Wink 
Yes, my husband knows of this forum that I go to regularly, and yes I understand where you're coming from! He doesn't come here because it seems that I'm always telling him about what's going on with who and all that stuff!! He's come to realize that I need somewhere to go to get things off of my chest...it saves him from my whining, a lot of it anyway, because I whine to you all here!!
He's more than welcome to come and do some venting of his own...in fact, I welcome him to do so!!
Just be up front and honest with her, let her sit beside you sometime when you get on and see what's going on and what you're posting about...it'll help her to understand what this is all about!!
Punk   :0)
"If I were any better....I'd only be half as good as you!!"
 
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#6
Pote2002

Although I am no longer a part of the WC world (my case was settled in 2005) I still continue to come to this board to try and help when and where I can. My boyfriend, who I wasn't with at the time of injury, doesn't quite understand why I spend so much time on the forum. But it was my godsend when I became injured, and I feel as if the forum is an extended family. When I am here, and my boyfriend looks to see what I am doing, he teases me and says that I am talking to my other boyfriend. I guess at times I have spent more time here, than I have with him.

Get your wife involved with the forum. It will give here a good chance to see what happens here, and how we all try to help one another out. And, there may be things that she is trying to deal with in regards to your injury that she can't talk to you about, but may be able to talk to us. And if anything were to ever happen to you (God Forbid), she would then have the ability to come here and let us know so that we wouldn't sit and wonder or worry.

Sharing this sight with her, may even make what sounds like wonderful marriage to me, even stronger.

Angel ^j^
I've always been crazy, but it keeps me from going insane.
************
Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open
 
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#7
I, like UndecovrAngel settled my case last July, and I still come to this board asking questions and getting advise/opinions from the Board members. Do I feel that I am cheating on my spouse or cheating on son...absolutely not. This forum has helped me tenfold and my family knows. I have shared this forum with my pain doctor, surgeon, husband and son. The advise & opinions expressed by everyone is in regards to my injury, attorney problems, court matters, and personal frustrations. I have never come on here to discuss my marital issues...BUT if I needed to, I am comfortable enough with the board members to know that they will support me and give me opinions & help if I asked.

Babebahn...("Tongues don't have erasers.")
Babebahn..."Tongues don't have erasers"
Injured 1999 3 level anterior cervical fusion 2001
Settled Work Comp Case 2006 w/ Lifetime Medical Currently, C7-T1 is being watched will possibly need surgery front/back fusion from C3-T2, lower back needs another facet injection.
 
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#8
Funny Pote: Yes, I understand what you are saying BUT as part of the trust and respect comes being able to do things apart from each other without worry! The way my marriage of 30 years has worked is by giving each other our space. I've always been very independent, so has he, but everyone is different. I have to admit that this board is quite addicting. Tongue
Let Go, and Let God......
 
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#9
OH heck pote - I can go one better - I met my hubby on this board. But don't worry I was single at the time and we started out as friends and talked for quite a while. Met as friends actually in person and let nature take it's course so to say. His course settled in 2005 and he's back to work. My case just ended, but I still have medical issues that WC never addressed that we are now addressing.

Does driller know of this site - hmmmmmmmm guess so, but he no longer has time to come here. Instead when he is home he has his own way of relaxing. His own site that he goes to. So like you say sometimes you got to have some fun with life.

The site he goes to is "Cindy" and this is "Lupe", so I think he spent more time talking with Cindy yesterday than I did with Lupe ........... and people in public look at us funny like we know each other is cheating - but they have no idea what we are talking about.
 
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#10
Pote...If my husband was to post here he would say.."THANK YOU ALL" he knows I spend time here. When I was first injuried I thought I would be fixed and back to work in no time. And when it didn't go that way, I was so confused with the wc system and didn't even know what RSD was. I turned to the internet. (I didn't even know how to really use a computer) Once I found sites that I felt were safe and knowledgeable I started posting. My husband was saved from having to listen to me being so concerned or scared of what was happening or what was coming next. Because I was able to read it here. He has also read alot here. I think he truley is relieved that I have some peace. And he knows I have others to talk to that know just what I am going through. My husband is at work when I am on most of the time. I am never on the pc when he first comes home. We always make sure that each other comes before anything else. We have a very close marriage and I will never let my injury or anything come in between that. The other good thing is when my pain gets me up in the middle of the night..he used to feel like he had to get up with me. But he now knows I can get on the computer till the medications help.I would say my husband would buy me a computer tomorrow if ours broke..just so I had the support. So no I don't feel like I'm cheating. And he would say the same. Just have to make sure we are giving the time to our spouses and our families. Spring
 
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